Job Update
I just wanted to give you all an update on my job/internship. I’ve been working in the bookstore for a good 10 weeks now and I might as well admit it; I’m sick as hell of it.
In the beginning I was really nervous – I was just so scared that I’d fuck up and embarrass myself. But I made it through the first weeks without major mess ups. It went better than I feared it would. It’s been tough on my poor body, especially my back and feet, but it’s been better the last weeks of course xD
Actually I like the job in itself. I like having to help people finding the things they need, talking to them, looking at thge books, ‘playing store’ at the counter.. I even like wrapping books now DD:
That’s not the problem.
The problem is the others out there. In the beginning I figured “It’s normal, they need to get to know me and then we’ll talk properly,” – In the middle part I was so happy to be doing well, that I hardly thought about what they thought of me.
But now it’s really bugging me that they STILL don’t treat me like an equal. They talk and laugh and have great talks with fun... Just not with me included.
I’m not part of the staff and that’s even though I’ve been there for over 2 months O_o They should trust me and know me by now. I don’t even know how old they are or where they live O_O I know one of them studies to be a social worker and another is studying English. The rest.. I have no clue of anything besides their first name and an age of one of the others.
I also know that this person once lived in China for a few years and taught English at a Chinese school – And that he’s married and has a son o.o
That’s it O_O Seriously!
They know almost anything about me if they listened when we speak. They ask me questions, but once I answer them they give me nothing back about themselves.
I like two of them and even them I know nothing about. Except that one of them doesn’t own a TV – Woo, massive info!
And I’m completely convinced they only think that I’m lazy and I can’t work properly. They have the impression that I complain about anything and that I’m in pain constantly. -.-
I don’t want to seem like that, but I know I do. But I’m really not like that D: I’m just not as strong as them, I can’t carry 12 books without falling with them or worse -.- And I might be slow at getting the details of being at the counter but I’m there to learn and I WANT to!
Just not when they’re like this.. I can't wait for this to be over x_x I don't feel good at all there and all I want is for the final days to be over..
Thankfully I’m only counting DAYS until that’s over *_*
